As an abundance coach I get this question a lot. I have worked with couples that have shared accounts only, separate accounts only and then a bit of both. Every couple wants to know the same thing, are we doing it right? So what do you think, should couples have separate or joint bank accounts?
The answer: It depends on the couple.
I know very cliché response of me, but it is true. Some couples just can’t handle having their finances separated, it is overwhelming, more work and they struggle. Other couples thrive with the individuality and blend. Personally, I prefer to have my account with my husband together, I just like everything in one spot, it is simpler.
But here are a few rules to follow no matter which accounts you have.
- No secrets. Its fine to have separate accounts but you have to be open about where they are, what is in them and how it contributes to your financial future together. Secrets cause stress, fights and eventually separation.
- Make it fair. Make sure what each person is contributing to the household is fair. For example, if I have a couple where one person makes $6000 a month and the other makes $3000 a month yet they both contribute $2000 to the household expenses – THAT’S NOT FAIR! I personally believe it should be based on income. Do it on a percentage basis if that works for you. Even legendary Suze Orman agrees with me. (Check out this article)
- Communicate. One of the biggest dividers when it comes to marriage and money is “Well, I worked hard for it so I’m going to spend it.” Grow the F up. Are you in a marriage? Are you partners? Then you do things together, for each other, not just for yourself. Don’t be a selfish Sally or Sam. Communicate about what you need, why you need it. You’ll find it isn’t usually an item you want and need… it is a feeling you are looking for.
So should couples have separate bank accounts? What do you think?
Now I know this doesn’t cover the “What if my spouse doesn’t want to change” question. For that we need a consult. Guess what I don’t often even have to work with both people in a relationship to start making changes, most often the biggest changes come from an individual! If you have ever thought of getting some help with your personal finances and budget, please reach out, book a discovery call (FREE!) and we can chat about where you are at and how we can get you to where you want to be!